Thursday, September 21, 2006

Going Out To A Certain Someone...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR RICH...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!

Hope you have an awesome day, Rich!

~ Jenny Lynn ~

Monday, September 18, 2006

My Own Stupidity

I feel like I'm going to die.
It's my own fault though...
I'm stupid.

~ Jenny Lynn ~

Friday, September 01, 2006

A New Video

Gladiator Kitty and Wonder Dog: This video is too cute! It\'s of Maximus and Lily Ann...

Do you ever wonder...

what the hell are people thinking?

I've been thinking that about myself for awhile now. I mean, seriously, what the hell am I thinking half the time? I'm really sick of screwing up and that's all that I seem to be doing. I can't even count on ONE hand let alone TWO the number of mistakes that I've made in the past year.

Going out on the road was an experience that I don't know if I really should've had. But then again, I wouldn't have had the chance for other things if I hadn't gone on the road. I should've just sucked it up and lived at home and gone to school. As was the plan, until I went and found the band. Now, I doubt if I'll even return to school again. Which would be another mistake, but you know....what else is new? My parents are all forms of crazy people and we're not ever going to have a relationship...but is it weird missing a family I never had to begin with? I just see the t.v. families and I wonder...why the hell aren't families like THAT? The normalcy, the closeness...it's all fake. And it sucks to realize that NO family in the world is ever like that.

I've had to ask myself what regret is. Lately, I've been dwelling on things that I closed the book on a long time ago. Is that what regret is? Because in all honesty, I've never really sat and thought about the things I SHOULD'VE done instead of all the things that I ended up doing. I'm a very impulsive person at times...and I think I've been very impulsive with my life.

I was so excited to get a new job at the beginning of the week. It's what I like to do: child care. It's great, a challenge at times, but I don't think it's going to really pay the bills that need to be paid. I can't go to school because we don't have the money for it. Can't apply for loans or financial aid because my parents claim me in their taxes and crap. I'm not really qualified to do a lot of things...and I'm too much of a wimp to stick to something that makes $8.00/hr but I hate working at the place. I know it's a hard thing to grasp onto, but I want to make money doing something that I like...not something that I HAVE to do. And I know, that's what a JOB is...it's not necessarily sunshine and rainbows...it's a friggin' paycheck. Right?

I know I need to grow up. I need to stop being a kid and start worrying about the things that are important... I'm just scared to lose the rest of my innocence (yeah, the innocence that I have left) to adulthood. I don't think this is making any sense at all...it's just really hard for me at times because it feels like I'm alone and I have to deal with all of this on my own (even though I know a lot of you care). There's just a lot of things that I'm still worrying about on how I'm going to get through and pay bills. I'm scared of being on my own. I'm scared of just being another face in a sea of people. I'm scared of letting you all down. So much is psyching me out right now...and I told myself it wouldn't happen. At least, I know that I'm not backing out this time. It just isn't going to happen.

I had the worst dream ever last night. All thanks to the movies we were watching in the last few days...Kyle XY, Dragonheart, Legends of the Fall, Mighty Ducks, and Walking Tall. Yeah, imagine a dream with Kyle XY the major plot but with all the stories tied into one. It was crazy. I can't even begin to go into detail. I woke up in a sweat to find the light off (argh!) and the closet door open (double argh!). Anyhow, it just freaks me out about things even more.

Maybe I just need to take a second for myself and breathe. Catch up with myself a little bit. I feel like I'm spinning around so fast that I've made myself so completely lost. I don't even know where I am anymore. How is this possible? I've never been this off the map before. My life right now is totally summed up in the song "These Walls" by Trapt. Perfect song for the moment.
I wish I could tell you guys everything, I really do. But I don't even know where to begin...and I doubt any of this is going to come out right and I'll just sound crazy.

I'll be fine though. I think I just need to take a moment for myself. Just be completely alone...no phone, no friends, no music. Just me. I think it's exactly what I need. I just needed to ramble a little and get things off my chest. I'm sorry.

~ Jenny Lynn ~

Saturday, August 26, 2006

one month...

until my big day.
Just thought I'd share that random fact with ya'll.

~ Jenny Lynn ~

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Pictures!

Aunt Jenny and Drax watching t.v. together...
Like we need directions on how to cross the street...GOSH!
Yes, Lily Ann actually sleeps like that.
Joe being a bum...
I absolutely LOVE this kid!




Tuesday, August 15, 2006

A Day Without Sunshine Is...

...well, NIGHT.

Joe: You need a God in your life. Wait, you have me.

Me: Unfortunately then, that means you're Buddha!

Jenny - 1
Joe - 0

Just felt like sharing that zing time.

~ Jenny Lynn ~

p.s. Job situation...still up in the air.

Oh Boy...

...I'm in trouble! So...Saturday at work, a turtle was brought in my Shea (he's one of the Animal Control people). Shea told me that I could take it home and Erin was standing there and she totally agreed with Shea. She never said that I wasn't allowed to or not...me, being new and all, had no idea that I probably couldn't. So...I got the okay from my man to bring home Mr. T. And he's been in the backyard for the past couple days. Well, yesterday at work...Yvonne (she's my manager) found out about the whole turtle thing and said that I had to bring in the turtle sometime during the next couple days. So, I planned on bringing him back today. Well, I saw Mr. T today in the yard a couple times...but I was planning on waiting until Joe got home from work to take him in. We went out to Alberto's after he got home and before we left, Mr T was in the yard still...we were at lunch and my phone rings...it was my work but I didn't answer because it's my day off and whatnot. Yvonne left a message saying that I needed to bring in the stupid turtle TODAY...well, the problem is....he disappeared AGAIN! I can't find him in the backyard! YIKES, right? So...Joe and I decided that if it comes down to it we'll just take him in tomorrow and act like I didn't have my phone on me at all today. Okay...I just got a call from Yvonne saying that my job is on the line...guys: I CAN GET FIRED OVER THIS!!!!!!! Can we say FREAK OUT?! I'm such a nervous wreck right now...what am I gonna do??????

I don't want to call her back because I can't tell her that we left the turtle outside...that's horrible...but WHAT am I going to do? I can't not have a job AGAIN! ARGH!

Sorry. Vented. But I still don't feel any better. I suck at life....

~ Jenny Lynn ~

Friday, August 04, 2006

Life should be considered an OXYMORON.

I'm trying to figure out:
- what I'm going to do for the rest of my life.
- if I really want to go to college.
- how I'm going to get Bo out of the shelter.
- how I'm going to pay my cell phone bill.
- if I really want a blue blazer.
- how I'm going to go on Monday night with no white shoes.
- how I'm going to find the time to clean.
- why I stress out so much.
- why I'm such a horrible girlfriend.
- Lily.
- where I'm going to find a small dog that Joe doesn't think is ugly.
- why I'm such a complicated, high-matinence girl.
- life.

I don't know where to start. I'm frustrated with so much right now, and I have no idea why. I don't even know where to start with figuring out why. More or less, I just want to scream. You know, throw a temper-tantrum...

I can't even really talk about it because *I* don't even know what exactly is wrong. I just don't know where my life is going and I think that scares me a little. I just want to fast forward a couple of years.

****Symmie: I MISS YOU! You have no friggin' idea how much I want to hear your logic and all the fun stuff that you say. I should just move to Idaho....there's a thought. ****

I have to get ready for work. *groans* It's going to be busy today, I think. But, I get paid...and I might possibly be able to turn on my phone again! YAY!

Don't worry about me, I just had to bitch...sorry guys. I'm good. Seriously. Happy. :) see?

~ Jenny Lynn ~


Wednesday, August 02, 2006

To My Love

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR, JOSEPH SPENCER NEWMAN!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
Happy 21st Birthday, my love...you have no idea how happy I am that you were born. I hope you have a great day of relaxation...and a great night out with your boys. I love you so much...
Your,
Jenny

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Oh Happy Day!

Today, was a good day. Wow, that was incredibly general. I got to play and dance around in a down-pour of rain. It was GREAT! I was so soaked and the look on Joe's face when I finally came inside. It was priceless. My mother never let me play in the rain so now that I'm out of her house, whenever it rains...you can bet I'm outside dancing like an idiot. Oh gosh, it's fun...you should try it. So...that was the first good part of the night.

Secondly, I GOT A JOB! Yes, I do realize that I'm a little bit of a job slut...but this time, I really WANT this job. This is a job that I know I'm going to keep and I'm going to like. It's at the Humane Society and I get to be around animals...and you know how happy that makes me. So, I start tomorrow morning for training and everything. Ach! I'm excited. The pay isn't exactly that impressive...but my manager said that I get raises based on my work and whatnot. I start at $6.15 an hour. And I work from 12:00 pm to 7:00 pm on Monday, Thursday, Friday, and I don't remember the hours for the weekends. But, I have at least one day off a week with Joe. *insert happy dancing* His days off are on Wednesdays and Thursdays...so yay!

I had a job interview at Subway this afternoon as well. I aced it, and the manager wanted me to work for her. But, tomorrow morning I'll have to call her and let her know that I won't be able to. I told her in the interview that I was waiting for a callback from another place, and she was pretty understanding about it. So...yeah. I could work two jobs...huh, maybe I'll think on that a little....

I need to go to bed. So...I'll talk to ya'll later. I'll let you know how tomorrow goes at the Humane Society. Yippy skippy! Night everyone...

~ Jenny Lynn ~

Saturday, July 22, 2006

BLAH!

blah. blah. blah. blah. blah.
That's how I feel...
I want to collapse and fall asleep for years.
You know...
like Rip Van Winkle...lucky bastard.
I'm discouraged...
I shouldn't be, but I am.
I hate complaining and I'm trying not to...
it could be a lot worse, right?
Yes.
A LOT worse.
I can do this...
right?
Please...convince me I can do this.
I'm strong.
I'm happy.
I'm free.
I must be
something...
But why do I feel like
I'm nothing?
~ Jenny Lynn ~

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Is This Bad?

So...it's now 11:04 PM and I have to work at 3:00 AM. Is it bad that I haven't really had a first day of work and I already hate it? Yeah, I thought so. You know what this means? I'm not going to have a life anymore. I have to go to bed at 8:00 PM to have a decent night's rest....or, I crash right when I come home at noon and wake up at 8:30 PM and just stay awake until I work in the morning. But neither option gives me a real life... *screams* Jenny isn't so happy. I don't know...tomorrow morning I'm going to go visit with my boss and see if I can get a night job. Because if that's possible, I can still work in the morning time until I have to go to work at 4:00. But I haven't told you about that, have I? So...there's a lady who lives just down the street that needs someone to watch her year old daughter. She would need someone from 6:30 AM to around 3:00 PM in the afternoon every day. It doesn't pay so much...but if I'm able to talk to my boss about scheduling me after 4:00, then it'll work out just fine. Or, I can find a restaurant that I can work nights at. I'd still have no life...but ANYTHING is better than waking up at 2:00 in the morning and walking several blocks to be at work by 3:00. I'm sorry I'm complaining...I'm just really emotional right now. If I could, I would want to ignore myself at the moment too.

Right now, there's really no point in me going to bed. I mean, that's only about two hours of sleep...and is it really worth having two hours and fighting the blahs first thing when I wake up...or fighting the blahs now when I'm already awake? I would give anything to just say "screw you King Soopers" and find another job. But it's money and I need to start doing my share...I don't so much like being a freeloader...

That's really the only thing that's frustrating me right now...is this whole stupid job thing and kissing my social life goodbye. The job wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't friggin' 3:00 in the friggin' MORNING! I'm a wimp, okay? Deal with it.

On a better note....I'm the luckiest girl in the world because I have such an amazing boyfriend. Joe puts up with my mood and my blahs, and if I were him, I would want to strangle me or lock me in a closet for forever, but no....you know what he does? He makes me lunch, checks up on me during the day, and goes to the store for me even though he probably didn't want to. That, and his killer tacos on Tuesday night were AMAZING by the way. My man sure knows how to cook....much thanks to his mother! But yes...Joe is more than I feel like I deserve right now. He's my penguin and I'm so glad that he puts up with me...annoying quirks, bad mood, and all. THANK YOU LOVE! I APPRECIATE YOU.

I need to find something to do for the next couple hours...maybe I will take a nap...or something. I'm just not very happy and I'd rather stay like this for a while and then come home and crash in the morning. Maybe I'll just quit the job...oh, I wish.

Laters...
~ Jenny Lynn ~

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Random Picture

Yes, it's a REAL sign located somewhere in the North East...I can't really remember where. I just found it in my old pictures of the road and I still think it's funny. But I'm not sure that my mom sould stop at East Coast...call me crazy.

Monday, July 17, 2006

A Dedication

Mr. Rich Newman....you ROCK the computer world! Thanks to Rich, I now have access to putting videos onto my blog! *insert happy dancing here* I'm SO excited...I can't contain it. And I owe it all to Rich...you are a GENIUS. Thank you so much for all your help...I appreciate it. Yay Rich!

~ Jenny Lynn ~

Videos!

Bo and Max: Bo attempting to play with Max...not working.



Joe's Hand: Joe and I testing out my new video phone thingy...



Max at the vet: Max\'s first trip to the vet! He was having so much fun exploring the waiting room.


Redneck Swimming Pool: Drax in a bucket...

A Tad Annoyed

I was just watching t.v. and I saw a preview for a movie that comes out in August. It's called World Trade Center. I'm not gonna lie, I'm just a tad annoyed and a little sickened that the media would try to make money off of September 11th. It's kind of sad that they have to feed off of the nation's pain to make a little bit of pocket money. I don't know, I just find it VERY distasteful...but that's just me.

On a different note, I GOT A JOB! *insert much rejoicing here* I'm going to start at King Soopers as a Bakery Clerk. Technically, I start on Wednesday but I have to go in tomorrow for some training...I think she said 4 hours of it. Yippy friggin' skippy. It's a job...and I'm excited.

Oy. I think I'm going to take a nap. There's something about the heat that just makes me so incredibly tired. I don't really like it all that much. Heat = blah.

Alright...I'm out. Have a good day ya'll.

~ Jenny Lynn ~

Sunday, July 16, 2006

Subject Lines Suck When There's No Subject...

I don't really have a subject to this entry...is that bad? Be warned: it's full of senseless rambelings. It's been a little over a month since I've seen Bo...maybe it's been two months, I lost track of time...and he's grown SO much. It makes me a little sad to think about how much I missed out on. He's still the epitome of a dumb dog to the core. I just love his face and his personality, no matter how defiant he is. When Seth dropped him off yesterday morning and he got out of the truck, all I could think about was the day I brought him home from the pound. He was SO incredibly tiny and shaking. And now, four months later? He's nine months and bigger than ever. But he's still my Bo...like always. He's been infatuated with Max since he arrived...and Max wants ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with him. It's kind of comical, yet a little scary. Bo doesn't know when he's too rough so I'm a little fearful of something happening to Max if Bo attempts to play with him. Bo = 45 lbs. Max = 1.5 lbs. which, call me crazy, is not very fair to combine the two. Lily and Bo have been playing like crazy as well...they missed each other! I'm not gonna lie, I missed my baby boy...and I'm gonna cry when I have to give him back again. *insert puppy dog look at Joe*

So what else is new? Joe and I attempted to grocery shop at Walmart today...but oddly enough, it was closed? Um, I think they said that they had no power....odd. We went to Safeway instead and I know ya'll will probably think I'm nuts but I LOVE shopping with Joe. Okay, going anywhere with Joe is so much fun, in general. I don't know...it's not anything that he does... it's just....nice. I like it. Oh, and I got to talk to his mom for a couple minutes...that was pretty cool. *waves to Joe's mom* Joe wants to make tacos...and I think he's making them on Tuesday night. I'm glad he can cook because I still need to perfect my skills in that department. Ask him about the hambuger helper someday and see what he says...

I might be spending the night over at Brittany's house tonight...I don't know yet. I really want to sleep...but I know we're gonna be your typical girls and talk for the majority of the night...it's a toss up. Goo. I'll make my mind up about it soon...

I HAVE A JOB INTERVIEW IN THE MORNING!!!!!!! Yes, it's true. It's at 11:00 AM at King Soopers. They *finally* called me back. If that doesn't work out, hopefully the 7-11 thing will. I just want a job...

Random Question: If you were a pirate wouldn't it make you a little upset to have a trunk full of treasure but it had no handles; therefore, you had no way to transport the treasure because you left your bag at home? Yes, I realize that it was random...just something I was thinking about.

Anyways, that's all I've got. I'll talk to ya'll later. I'm gonna go attempt to cool off. Oh, and since Rich keeps forgetting to tell me how to place videos on blogger....here's my link to a couple videos. There will be several pictures that you've probably already seen on here...but watch the videos...I recommend the ones of Drax in his redneck swimming pool. But here it is: www.t-mobilepictures.com/openwebpage ... Enjoy and you're more than welcome to leave a comment with those too! Alright, I'm gonna go. Have a good night and whatnot. Happy Sunday!

~ Jenny Lynn ~

My Joe

This is a picture Joe sent me this morning via text message. I believe his caption read, "Fat free, my ass." I thought it was cute and worthy of my page.
Ain't my man a hottie?!?!?! *sigh* As one girl (who Joe used to know) said to me the other day: "that is one sexy piece of man flesh." That girl is no longer living. Okay, so I'm kidding. But she was right about how good he looks.
He's got a smile to die for, what can I say?