Life should be considered an OXYMORON.

I'm trying to figure out:
- what I'm going to do for the rest of my life.
- if I really want to go to college.
- how I'm going to get Bo out of the shelter.
- how I'm going to pay my cell phone bill.
- if I really want a blue blazer.
- how I'm going to go on Monday night with no white shoes.
- how I'm going to find the time to clean.
- why I stress out so much.
- why I'm such a horrible girlfriend.
- Lily.
- where I'm going to find a small dog that Joe doesn't think is ugly.
- why I'm such a complicated, high-matinence girl.
- life.

I don't know where to start. I'm frustrated with so much right now, and I have no idea why. I don't even know where to start with figuring out why. More or less, I just want to scream. You know, throw a temper-tantrum...

I can't even really talk about it because *I* don't even know what exactly is wrong. I just don't know where my life is going and I think that scares me a little. I just want to fast forward a couple of years.

****Symmie: I MISS YOU! You have no friggin' idea how much I want to hear your logic and all the fun stuff that you say. I should just move to Idaho....there's a thought. ****

I have to get ready for work. *groans* It's going to be busy today, I think. But, I get paid...and I might possibly be able to turn on my phone again! YAY!

Don't worry about me, I just had to bitch...sorry guys. I'm good. Seriously. Happy. :) see?

~ Jenny Lynn ~

To My Love

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR, JOSEPH SPENCER NEWMAN!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!

Happy 21st Birthday, my love...you have no idea how happy I am that you were born. I hope you have a great day of relaxation...and a great night out with your boys. I love you so much...

Your,

Jenny

Oh Happy Day!

Today, was a good day. Wow, that was incredibly general. I got to play and dance around in a down-pour of rain. It was GREAT! I was so soaked and the look on Joe's face when I finally came inside. It was priceless. My mother never let me play in the rain so now that I'm out of her house, whenever it rains...you can bet I'm outside dancing like an idiot. Oh gosh, it's fun...you should try it. So...that was the first good part of the night.

Secondly, I GOT A JOB! Yes, I do realize that I'm a little bit of a job slut...but this time, I really WANT this job. This is a job that I know I'm going to keep and I'm going to like. It's at the Humane Society and I get to be around animals...and you know how happy that makes me. So, I start tomorrow morning for training and everything. Ach! I'm excited. The pay isn't exactly that impressive...but my manager said that I get raises based on my work and whatnot. I start at $6.15 an hour. And I work from 12:00 pm to 7:00 pm on Monday, Thursday, Friday, and I don't remember the hours for the weekends. But, I have at least one day off a week with Joe. *insert happy dancing* His days off are on Wednesdays and Thursdays...so yay!

I had a job interview at Subway this afternoon as well. I aced it, and the manager wanted me to work for her. But, tomorrow morning I'll have to call her and let her know that I won't be able to. I told her in the interview that I was waiting for a callback from another place, and she was pretty understanding about it. So...yeah. I could work two jobs...huh, maybe I'll think on that a little....

I need to go to bed. So...I'll talk to ya'll later. I'll let you know how tomorrow goes at the Humane Society. Yippy skippy! Night everyone...

~ Jenny Lynn ~

BLAH!

blah. blah. blah. blah. blah.

That's how I feel...

I want to collapse and fall asleep for years.

You know...

like Rip Van Winkle...lucky bastard.

I'm discouraged...

I shouldn't be, but I am.

I hate complaining and I'm trying not to...

it could be a lot worse, right?

Yes.

A LOT worse.

I can do this...

right?

Please...convince me I can do this.

I'm strong.

I'm happy.

I'm free.

I must be

something...

But why do I feel like

I'm nothing?

~ Jenny Lynn ~

Is This Bad?

So...it's now 11:04 PM and I have to work at 3:00 AM. Is it bad that I haven't really had a first day of work and I already hate it? Yeah, I thought so. You know what this means? I'm not going to have a life anymore. I have to go to bed at 8:00 PM to have a decent night's rest....or, I crash right when I come home at noon and wake up at 8:30 PM and just stay awake until I work in the morning. But neither option gives me a real life... *screams* Jenny isn't so happy. I don't know...tomorrow morning I'm going to go visit with my boss and see if I can get a night job. Because if that's possible, I can still work in the morning time until I have to go to work at 4:00. But I haven't told you about that, have I? So...there's a lady who lives just down the street that needs someone to watch her year old daughter. She would need someone from 6:30 AM to around 3:00 PM in the afternoon every day. It doesn't pay so much...but if I'm able to talk to my boss about scheduling me after 4:00, then it'll work out just fine. Or, I can find a restaurant that I can work nights at. I'd still have no life...but ANYTHING is better than waking up at 2:00 in the morning and walking several blocks to be at work by 3:00. I'm sorry I'm complaining...I'm just really emotional right now. If I could, I would want to ignore myself at the moment too.

Right now, there's really no point in me going to bed. I mean, that's only about two hours of sleep...and is it really worth having two hours and fighting the blahs first thing when I wake up...or fighting the blahs now when I'm already awake? I would give anything to just say "screw you King Soopers" and find another job. But it's money and I need to start doing my share...I don't so much like being a freeloader...

That's really the only thing that's frustrating me right now...is this whole stupid job thing and kissing my social life goodbye. The job wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't friggin' 3:00 in the friggin' MORNING! I'm a wimp, okay? Deal with it.

On a better note....I'm the luckiest girl in the world because I have such an amazing boyfriend. Joe puts up with my mood and my blahs, and if I were him, I would want to strangle me or lock me in a closet for forever, but no....you know what he does? He makes me lunch, checks up on me during the day, and goes to the store for me even though he probably didn't want to. That, and his killer tacos on Tuesday night were AMAZING by the way. My man sure knows how to cook....much thanks to his mother! But yes...Joe is more than I feel like I deserve right now. He's my penguin and I'm so glad that he puts up with me...annoying quirks, bad mood, and all. THANK YOU LOVE! I APPRECIATE YOU.

I need to find something to do for the next couple hours...maybe I will take a nap...or something. I'm just not very happy and I'd rather stay like this for a while and then come home and crash in the morning. Maybe I'll just quit the job...oh, I wish.

Laters...
~ Jenny Lynn ~

Random Picture

Yes, it's a REAL sign located somewhere in the North East...I can't really remember where. I just found it in my old pictures of the road and I still think it's funny. But I'm not sure that my mom sould stop at East Coast...call me crazy.

A Dedication

Mr. Rich Newman....you ROCK the computer world! Thanks to Rich, I now have access to putting videos onto my blog! *insert happy dancing here* I'm SO excited...I can't contain it. And I owe it all to Rich...you are a GENIUS. Thank you so much for all your help...I appreciate it. Yay Rich!

~ Jenny Lynn ~

Videos!

			Bo and Max: Bo attempting to play with Max...not working.

			Joe's Hand: Joe and I testing out my new video phone thingy...

			Max at the vet: Max\'s first trip to the vet! He was having so much fun exploring the waiting room.

			Redneck Swimming Pool: Drax in a bucket...

A Tad Annoyed

I was just watching t.v. and I saw a preview for a movie that comes out in August. It's called World Trade Center. I'm not gonna lie, I'm just a tad annoyed and a little sickened that the media would try to make money off of September 11th. It's kind of sad that they have to feed off of the nation's pain to make a little bit of pocket money. I don't know, I just find it VERY distasteful...but that's just me.

On a different note, I GOT A JOB! *insert much rejoicing here* I'm going to start at King Soopers as a Bakery Clerk. Technically, I start on Wednesday but I have to go in tomorrow for some training...I think she said 4 hours of it. Yippy friggin' skippy. It's a job...and I'm excited.

Oy. I think I'm going to take a nap. There's something about the heat that just makes me so incredibly tired. I don't really like it all that much. Heat = blah.

Alright...I'm out. Have a good day ya'll.

~ Jenny Lynn ~

Subject Lines Suck When There's No Subject...

I don't really have a subject to this entry...is that bad? Be warned: it's full of senseless rambelings. It's been a little over a month since I've seen Bo...maybe it's been two months, I lost track of time...and he's grown SO much. It makes me a little sad to think about how much I missed out on. He's still the epitome of a dumb dog to the core. I just love his face and his personality, no matter how defiant he is. When Seth dropped him off yesterday morning and he got out of the truck, all I could think about was the day I brought him home from the pound. He was SO incredibly tiny and shaking. And now, four months later? He's nine months and bigger than ever. But he's still my Bo...like always. He's been infatuated with Max since he arrived...and Max wants ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with him. It's kind of comical, yet a little scary. Bo doesn't know when he's too rough so I'm a little fearful of something happening to Max if Bo attempts to play with him. Bo = 45 lbs. Max = 1.5 lbs. which, call me crazy, is not very fair to combine the two. Lily and Bo have been playing like crazy as well...they missed each other! I'm not gonna lie, I missed my baby boy...and I'm gonna cry when I have to give him back again. *insert puppy dog look at Joe*

So what else is new? Joe and I attempted to grocery shop at Walmart today...but oddly enough, it was closed? Um, I think they said that they had no power....odd. We went to Safeway instead and I know ya'll will probably think I'm nuts but I LOVE shopping with Joe. Okay, going anywhere with Joe is so much fun, in general. I don't know...it's not anything that he does... it's just....nice. I like it. Oh, and I got to talk to his mom for a couple minutes...that was pretty cool. *waves to Joe's mom* Joe wants to make tacos...and I think he's making them on Tuesday night. I'm glad he can cook because I still need to perfect my skills in that department. Ask him about the hambuger helper someday and see what he says...

I might be spending the night over at Brittany's house tonight...I don't know yet. I really want to sleep...but I know we're gonna be your typical girls and talk for the majority of the night...it's a toss up. Goo. I'll make my mind up about it soon...

I HAVE A JOB INTERVIEW IN THE MORNING!!!!!!! Yes, it's true. It's at 11:00 AM at King Soopers. They *finally* called me back. If that doesn't work out, hopefully the 7-11 thing will. I just want a job...

Random Question: If you were a pirate wouldn't it make you a little upset to have a trunk full of treasure but it had no handles; therefore, you had no way to transport the treasure because you left your bag at home? Yes, I realize that it was random...just something I was thinking about.

Anyways, that's all I've got. I'll talk to ya'll later. I'm gonna go attempt to cool off. Oh, and since Rich keeps forgetting to tell me how to place videos on blogger....here's my link to a couple videos. There will be several pictures that you've probably already seen on here...but watch the videos...I recommend the ones of Drax in his redneck swimming pool. But here it is: www.t-mobilepictures.com/openwebpage ... Enjoy and you're more than welcome to leave a comment with those too! Alright, I'm gonna go. Have a good night and whatnot. Happy Sunday!

~ Jenny Lynn ~

My Joe

This is a picture Joe sent me this morning via text message. I believe his caption read, "Fat free, my ass." I thought it was cute and worthy of my page.
Ain't my man a hottie?!?!?! *sigh* As one girl (who Joe used to know) said to me the other day: "that is one sexy piece of man flesh." That girl is no longer living. Okay, so I'm kidding. But she was right about how good he looks.
He's got a smile to die for, what can I say?

Pictures!

Ha! Look what I found...this is from when we were painting the Youth Group room back in December. I think I got more paint on myself than I did painting the wall. And no...I really wasn't eating the paint.
Bo is infatuated with Max. It was their very first meeting yesterday. Bo likes Max...a little too much. He's very overzealous and doesn't know when to stop playing...Max is already sick of him. This is one of the calmer moments.
Look how big my baby has gotten! I wonder if this is how parents feel when they look at their children all grown up. All I see when I look at this 45 lb. dog is the little puppy that I brought home from the shelter. And when I say little...I mean, little.
"Is he gone yet?" Max hiding under the couch, trying his best to get away from Bo.
Aw...it's me. I don't remember what we were doing...but we were having fun...see? You can totally tell from my expression.

Not Ready To Make Nice

This is a really odd mood to be in. I'm really wanting to go skate. I mean, I have to let this frustration out somehow, right? I don't even really want to talk about what's bugging me but I know, eventually I'm gonna have to. GOO!

Don't get me wrong, I know that I'm not the most attractive person ever. I KNOW that....but honestly, when I looked at her and realized that they were kept for a reason...how am I supposed to compete with THAT? Honestly. How? Am I not supposed to feel a little threatened by an old memory? True, it's a memory and I shouldn't be scared of it...but I am. I don't even know what I should feel right now. Maybe I shouldn't have looked. Okay, so I know that I probably shouldn't have looked and I feel bad about it. A LOT bad. But honestly...what now? Should I just act like I don't know?

~ Jenny ~

p.s. On a much happier and non-related subject: I get Bo for the weekend! *insert much joyous dancing here* I'm not gonna lie, I'm very excited.

Laundry

Ugh...the pile rises. And rises....

I've gotta do something useful...

~ jenny ~

More of Max

Enjoying a quiet moment with Max.
Isn't he ADORABLE????

I love my new kitty. He's incredibly sweet and he adores Lily...which is a major plus. Aaaahhhhh.....I owe Joe. I owe him A LOT.

~ jenny ~

Max

Max chilling at my feet.
Take me home! We were still in the pet store...but I had to send Joe pictures to approve the "cuteness" of the kitten. Apparently, Max was cute enough....because I got to take him home! The plus side? He was on sale for $10....heck yes.
Lily and Max get a long SO well! They play and they've been sleeping together....how cute is that? I just worry that Lily will bite too hard once and that'll finish off Max. That can happen, right?
Max wondering what a camera is...Ryan looking at the t.v.
Max deciding he's hungry and needs to eat out of a big bowl. He's too cute for words...

So...I realize that there are a lot of picutes of Max....and I've taken even more. I can't help it...he's so cute...and I'm a proud cat mom, alright? Anyhow, I better go. Katie and I are hanging out today and I gotta go see if she's up yet. I'm hungry. Food would be great right about now. Talk to ya'll later. Have a great weekend!

~ jenny ~

Finally....something.

Trembling emotions,

simplest pleasures,

sealed with

the epiphany

of a kiss.

Awakened

by rapture.

Held by

passions unknown

to my

infant heart.

Struck by

love's

blinding

spell

I am

dumbfounded

by uninvited

emotion.

What an

evil threat

love is!

To strike

upon my

unguarded

heart

with such

blind sensations.

No warnings

to heed,

I am

enchanted.

A lunatic

under

the spell of a man.

Lost in

your eyes,

mesmerized

by the

maddening

echo of

your voice.

Surreal

twighlight

dreams

of spending

forever

in rapturous

bliss...

There are those

who are searching,

seeking...

Desperately

in vain

to have

just a

taste

of love...

The magical

poison

that captured

my vacant

heart.

When love

found me,

kicking and

screaming....

Pleading for

the old familiar

numbness to

rush back into

the core of my

soul.

I was afraid.

I was lost...

but didn'tgive up.

Slowly,

The light

embraced me,

welcoming me,

into the warmth

of new emotions

divine.

Now I am

grateful to have

love in my life.

And you,
you have my heart.

And

now,

I am

grateful to

have you

in my life.

~ jenny ~

Holy Bejeebers!

23 places in ONE friggin day! Where I've applied so far:

Safeway

Coldstone

T.G.I.Friday's

Target

Pet-Co

Petsmart

Molly Maid

Blockbuster

Hollywood Video

Startech

King Soopers

Albertsons

Noodles and Comp.

McDonald's (urgh)

Subway

Walgreens

The Buckle

Radio Shack

T-Mobile

JC Penney

Kohl's

Ross

Outback Steakhouse

The places I need to go to:

Cinemark 16 at the Greeley Mall

Johnny Carinos

Olive Garden

Buffalo Wild Wings

Michael's

I'm trying my best not to get discouraged...it's only been about two days. But honestly, I hate this process. I hate doing stupid redundant applications online. They're pointless and yes, I do believe that Jenny is being negative right now. But oh well. All I can say is that all this crap better pay off really soon because I want that damn kitten.

~ jenny ~

The Cutest Thing

The CUTEST kitten I've ever seen.

This is killing me....GOO! I have words in my head....they are there....and I can't get them out in a way that they'll make sense. DOWN WITH WRITER'S BLOCK! I will go to bed right now and in the morning, there will be a poem written if it's the last thing I do. I'm serious....these words can't live inside my head for forever.
~ jenny ~